{"id":1050,"date":"2017-10-15T11:29:30","date_gmt":"2017-10-15T11:29:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/?p=1050"},"modified":"2017-10-15T11:47:24","modified_gmt":"2017-10-15T11:47:24","slug":"blogiversary","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/2017\/10\/15\/blogiversary\/","title":{"rendered":"blogiversary"},"content":{"rendered":"

One year ago I shared my deepest feelings to honor Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.\u00a0 Today is my one year\u00a0“blogiversary” and yet I feel like I have lived through a lifetime in this year.\u00a0\u00a0Before compiling this post, I read through my “coming out” post from one year ago, and decided to repost the link at the end of this one.\u00a0 I poured my heart and soul into those words and feel that I can’t recap what P.A.I.L. means to me any better than I did that day.<\/p>\n

For those of you who might not know my story, my husband and I had two miscarriages in 2016.\u00a0 It put a huge strain on our hearts, our marriage and our dream of one day having a family.\u00a0 We had to make a daily choice to support each others’ feelings and exhibit patience when on the days that were just hard.\u00a0 I originally began this blog as a private place to express my feelings, and felt the courage to share it on October 15th, 2016.\u00a0 Clicking “post” and “share” one year ago today left me feeling nauseated, shaky, uncertain and extremely vulnerable.\u00a0 In the hours, days and weeks that followed, I received countless messages from close friends and family to old friends, extended family and friends of friends.\u00a0 Some fellow sisters opened up to me about their own silent struggle with loss, and some just applauded me for sharing my story.\u00a0 It was by far the scariest thing that\u00a0I’ve ever done, but I have to say that in doing so\u00a0I came to\u00a0 feel the embrace of the sisterhood of fellow P.A.I.L victims.<\/p>\n

What I’ve learned\u00a0in this past year\u00a0is that experiencing P.A.I.L. does not mean that you are exempt from having your heart broken again, or sometimes even again after that. \u00a0It means that you might\u00a0begin to question your very purpose on this Earth.\u00a0 It means that you might wonder if you will ever have what some people take for granted.\u00a0 It means that your relationships with the ones you love the most are challenged by new perspectives and truths.\u00a0 It means that your next pregnancy might be filled with a constant sense of dread, mind controlling fear and distrust.\u00a0 It means that even the most optimistic person might just have a lower threshold for how much joy they are able to feel if that double pink line shows up on that test again.\u00a0 It means being hesitant to open your wounded heart up to the possibility of loving another life.\u00a0 It means that the heart just hurts some days, even years after loss.\u00a0 And the hurt, sometimes just can’t be put into words.<\/p>\n

Some women view their loss as a ball of tissue,\u00a0while others lose a life that began at conception.\u00a0 Some women hold their babies in their arms as they take their final breaths and others long to feel justified in their grief if their loss happened prior to\u00a0their first ultrasound.\u00a0 Whatever your personal experience with loss might be, it is a loss just the same.\u00a0\u00a0 Your loss represents the dream that was snatched away from you, leaving you feeling like there might have been more that you could have done to prevent it.<\/p>\n

1 in 4 women experience the heart break that is Pregnancy and Infant Loss. Pregnancy and infant loss is not selective. \u00a0It happens in all countries, at all ages, in all types of women- healthy and unhealthy. \u00a0It happens during birth sometimes. \u00a0It happens in the earliest weeks of pregnancy. \u00a0It happens for no known reason during the middle of pregnancy. \u00a0It happens after a premature birth and weeks of fighting to survive in the NICU. \u00a0It happens a week after going home. \u00a0Pregnancy and infant loss just happens sometimes.<\/p>\n

No\u00a0matter what\u00a0your personal opinion may be on the matter, know that it deeply wounds your friends, sisters, cousins, coworkers, neighbors\u00a0etc. and take the time to educate yourself on how to support them\u00a0if it does.\u00a0 Do not say things like “well at least you can get pregnant” or “everything happens for a reason” or “there was probably something wrong.”\u00a0Instead, offer your condolences for their loss and the acknowledge the\u00a0heartache that plagues them.\u00a0 If you can’t find the words, send a card or flowers like you would if they lost a family member- because they did.\u00a0 Acknowledge their grief by honoring the life\u00a0 and the dream that they lost. P.A.I.L. exists.\u00a0 It’s ugly, it’s heartbreaking and it’s unfair.<\/p>\n

We are remembering our two little ones today,\u00a0HOPE\u00a0and JOY\u00a0and the millions more who are affected by Pregnancy and Infant Loss.\u00a0 May those little lives, and the lives of those who love them fiercely find\u00a0peace in knowing that they are not alone.<\/p>\n

Read my original post here<\/a>:<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Join in the Wave of Light around the globe by lighting a candle this evening at 7pm (all time\u00a0zones)\u00a0to remember the little ones who were lost.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

One year ago I shared my deepest feelings to honor Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day.\u00a0 Today is my one year\u00a0“blogiversary” and yet I feel like I have lived through a lifetime in this year.\u00a0\u00a0Before compiling this post, I read through my “coming out” post from one year ago, and decided to repost the link at the end of this one.\u00a0 I poured my heart and soul into those words and feel that I can’t recap what P.A.I.L. means to me any better than I did that day. For those of you who might not know my story, my husband and I had two miscarriages in 2016.\u00a0 It put a huge strain on our hearts, our marriage and our dream of one day having a family.\u00a0 We had to make a daily choice to support each others’ feelings and exhibit patience when on the days that were just hard.\u00a0 I originally began this blog as a private place to express my feelings, and felt the courage to share it on October 15th, 2016.\u00a0 Clicking “post” and “share” one year ago today left me feeling nauseated, shaky, uncertain and extremely vulnerable.\u00a0 In the hours, days and weeks that followed, I received countless messages from close friends and family to old friends, extended family and friends of friends.\u00a0 Some fellow sisters opened up to me about their own silent struggle with loss, and some just applauded me for sharing my story.\u00a0 It was by far the scariest thing that\u00a0I’ve ever done, but I have to say that in doing so\u00a0I came to\u00a0 feel the embrace of the sisterhood of fellow P.A.I.L victims. What I’ve learned\u00a0in this past year\u00a0is that experiencing P.A.I.L. does not mean that you are exempt from having your heart broken again, or sometimes even again after that. \u00a0It means that you might\u00a0begin to question your very purpose on this Earth.\u00a0 It means that you might wonder if you will ever have what some people take for granted.\u00a0 It means that your relationships with the ones you love the most are challenged by new perspectives and truths.\u00a0 It means that your next pregnancy might be filled with a constant sense of dread, mind controlling fear and distrust.\u00a0 It means that even the most optimistic person might just have a lower threshold for how much joy they are able to feel if that double pink line shows up on that test again.\u00a0 It means being hesitant to open your wounded heart up to the possibility of loving another life.\u00a0 It means that the heart just hurts some days, even years after loss.\u00a0 And the hurt, sometimes just can’t be put into words. Some women view their loss as a ball of tissue,\u00a0while others lose a life that began at conception.\u00a0 Some women hold their babies in their arms as they take their final breaths and others long to feel justified in their grief if their loss happened prior to\u00a0their first ultrasound.\u00a0 Whatever your personal experience with loss might be, it is a loss just the same.\u00a0\u00a0 Your loss represents the dream that was snatched away from you, leaving you feeling like there might have been more that you could have done to prevent it. 1 in 4 women experience the heart break that is Pregnancy and Infant Loss. Pregnancy and infant loss is not selective. \u00a0It happens in all countries, at all ages, in all types of women- healthy and unhealthy. \u00a0It happens during birth sometimes. \u00a0It happens in the earliest weeks of pregnancy. \u00a0It happens for no known reason during the middle of pregnancy. \u00a0It happens after a premature birth and weeks of fighting to survive in the NICU. \u00a0It happens a week after going home. \u00a0Pregnancy and infant loss just happens sometimes. No\u00a0matter what\u00a0your personal opinion may be on the matter, know that it deeply wounds your friends, sisters, cousins, coworkers, neighbors\u00a0etc. and take the time to educate yourself on how to support them\u00a0if it does.\u00a0 Do not say things like “well at least you can get pregnant” or “everything happens for a reason” or “there was probably something wrong.”\u00a0Instead, offer your condolences for their loss and the acknowledge the\u00a0heartache that plagues them.\u00a0 If you can’t find the words, send a card or flowers like you would if they lost a family member- because they did.\u00a0 Acknowledge their grief by honoring the life\u00a0 and the dream that they lost. P.A.I.L. exists.\u00a0 It’s ugly, it’s heartbreaking and it’s unfair. We are remembering our two little ones today,\u00a0HOPE\u00a0and JOY\u00a0and the millions more who are affected by Pregnancy and Infant Loss.\u00a0 May those little lives, and the lives of those who love them fiercely find\u00a0peace in knowing that they are not alone. Read my original post here: Join in the Wave of Light around the globe by lighting a candle this evening at 7pm (all time\u00a0zones)\u00a0to remember the little ones who were lost.    <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1073,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1050","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-journey-to-parenthood"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/10\/IMG_7294-5.jpg?fit=3022%2C1928&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8oEBX-gW","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1050","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1050"}],"version-history":[{"count":17,"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1050\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1075,"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1050\/revisions\/1075"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1073"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1050"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1050"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hopemeetsjoy.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1050"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}