goodbye 2016

We will never be the same after 2016. I guess that can be said after any year, but this year posed more of a challenge to our marriage than the rest of the previous years combined. 2016 changed us in that it was the year that we celebrated two pregnancies. It was the year that made us parents. It was a year that was full of hope and dreams. It was a year that also inflicted deep sorrow and worry. It was a year that challenged us as a couple. We had to learn how to communicate our feelings to each other when it would have been so such easier to just shut down and block the other out, thinking that “they just don’t understand.”  2016 reminded us of how magical and simultaneously fragile life can be.  It confronted and strengthened our faith.  It tested our life plan.  2016 changed us forever.

And maybe that’s okay.  Maybe we needed to be challenged.  Maybe we needed to feel stronger after a year of disappointments.   Maybe this is exactly how our lives are supposed to pan out.  It doesn’t make the pain any less agonizing, or the wondering any less consuming, but it does give some peace of mind to know that we did survive 2016.

2016 highlights:

Being married to THIS man and being his wedding date in April, May and June.

Home visit to Dallas in May.

Finding the courage to blog, and tell all in October.

Seeing this beautiful, vibrant double rainbow in August

Our own private fireworks show (thanks neighbors!) on the 4th of July

THE CUBS WINNING THE WORLD SERIES!!!!!

Mom and sister visit to South Bend in September.

Last tailgate of the Farewell Tour in November.  BRRRRR!

Visiting a heavenly little North Eastern beach town in June.

Adding Theodore (Teddy) to our family in December

Being pregnant- no matter how briefly, in January/February and June/July.

Renewing my sense of calm, sense of self, and faith in the unseen- All year long.

Daring to hope, and seek joy daily during times of trial.

2017 promises to be a year of change.  On February 17th at 10:00 a.m., Tony will get an email telling us where we will move to this coming summer.   I will have to leave my job and find another one.  We will have to leave our home, which we love dearly.   We will pack up and start fresh some where new.   I have been dreading this transition for a while now.  I like our life.   Our life is comfortable.  Our home is our own.   South Bend was originally a place that I couldn’t wait to leave, and now I hate to see it go.  As scary as it seems to start over,  it’s a little less scary and daunting than before 2016 started.   After this year, I feel like Tony and I can tackle it together, no matter where 2017 takes us.   We will pack up our most essential pieces of DIY furniture, our two silly pups and all of our memories and take over a new city, together.

Our journey to parenthood continues in 2017.  I’m not sure what the future holds.  I do not really want to pursue more testing or procedures, but I want to make the most of the relationship I have with my current OBGYN practice.  I want to have more answers or more data to present to the next doctor in whatever city we end up in.

So goodbye 2016 and hello 2017.  I welcome you with wide open arms and a hopeful heart.